Well it's a new year and I suppose I should update this thing.There is not going to be any of this history recap... just into the guts of today I guess.

I'm really fucking annoyed. Stupid bitch @ work changed my Sunday shift, and CUT it an hour. So it's now 5-9 tues... wtf, as if I didn't have enough money problems atm, first she cuts me from 5 shifts there a fortnight, to 4... ok cool I can handle that, then it's 1 shift a week... pissed yes, but it's the Sunday so more money I can deal since I got another job workng at the hospital. Now it's the cheap day and less money. Stupid fucking bitch. I have 3 jobs yet I am only just scraping past as it is. Hopefully my mate gets me a job @ the servo, and I can tell that stupid bitch where to shove her job... or just not show up to my shift... I'll have to make sure it's her on before me though.

Enough about that shit. I really gotta get back into being motivated to GO to gym, once I'm there I'm fine, it's the getting there. Lately I seem to have headaches in the afternoon when I have to go to gym... but sometimes I wonder if it's the whole "oh I've got a headache I don't wanna go to gym" as might be used for sex... haha. Maybe I just wish my gym was closer... like next door closer. It's not even as if I have to drive far... like 5 mins down the road... idiot I am...

Sometimes I hate how insecure I feel, yet there's not much to be insecure about... or so everyone tells me. I just feel lke it's never good enough, no matter how hard I push at the gym... it's never going to be good enough. I get so frustrated at myself... garh. I'm sure I'm not the only one who thinks like this, sometimes I wonder though when I'm in the hsopping centre... do they think like this, does sh ethink like this... I'm guessing no matter how fit/skinny/etc ppl are, they always think it might not be good enough. I just don't know how to stop feeling like this.

Anyways... I'm shutting up, enough of this whiny bitchy crap for the minute.

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